Destruction

 Upon arrival in Joplin today, our crew faced complete destruction. This car was thrown into the lake in front of a destroyed apartment complex and near a industrial park that was flattened. The first thing I noticed from the car was the sights. On the way to Joplin, big exit signs were broken. In Joplin, there were hundreds of police men directing the chaotic traffic. There were tons of camera crews  (including a large CNN trailer). 

There were a number of large bulldozing machines. Many patriotic symbols amongst the rubble. When I stepped out of the car, I noticed the sounds of sirens and horns, of fear and uncertainty, and of hope and courage. After a few hours, we finally reached the major destructed path by the hospital and started working with the families in their clean up. I noticed smells, wet carpet and sawdust being the most prominent.

 It's hard to even grasp the entire situation until you see it. Entire strips malls, such as the one to the right, are stripped of their identity. Street signs have been torn from their posts causing traffic to be chaotic and disorganized. There is a lot of help, but it is also very disorganized. Today, we worked with United Way and AmeriCorps out of St.Louis. We met a railroad worker from Kansas City who is taking vacation time to help in Joplin. People are very generous.

We worked for many hours, trying to clear yards of large trees and debris but there is still so much...
It was interesting to talk with the families who own these homes. We heard their stories. They were surprisingly optimistic and light-hearted about the situation. I guess that's all they can do...


PRAY PRAY PRAY CONTINUOUSLY.

IB DONE

I am finally done with the International Baccalaureate program FOREVER!

I have completed a total of 12 tests in 6 different subjects exceeding 20 hours.
I have finished the Community Action Service program requiring over 150 hours.
I have written reflections for each activity in the CAS program.
I have written an Extended Essay which resulted in around 15 pages.
I have composed three original songs with abstract papers.
I have taken the Theory of Knowledge class and written a few essays for TOK.
I have written over 10 Internal Assessment papers.
I have performed music alone for over 20 minutes.
I have undergone two rounds of English Orals and one round of Spanish Orals.
I have endured one too many all-nighters in preparation due to procrastination.
I have read over 25 books during my time in IB and spark-noted more.
I have used around 1000 notecards and 300 sticky notes.


I have done all of this plus SPS requirements to graduate high school. 


I am proud to be done with the IB program. The biggest accomplishment I have ever reached. Truthfully, I did not think I would make it. But taking tasks one at a time helps complete them all in a timely manner.


Now is the waiting game. I wait for the scores of my tests. Let's hope I get an average of a 5 on all of my tests (1-7 scoring). They should come out in mid-July. Even if I don't get a 5 on each of my tests, I do not want to FAIL. For failure is my biggest fear.

High

I am not sure if any drug could give me this high.

I am high. Super duper high. Uber high. ON LIFE.

Talk about being loved. I am SO very blessed and I think I sometimes take that fact for granted. I had a crowd come through my graduation party and it showed me what a great church family, family, school, and life I have. 

I am speechless. I want to say something that would represent the feelings I have but nothing is sufficient to explain my extreme gratitude. 

I am thoroughly thankful for a number of people. Specifically my parents and family who set up an amazing party that was extremely successful. In addition, Stephen played me beautiful songs as usual. :)

Lastly, my BFF Courtney Tay is the light of my life and I am going to miss her so very much next year. She is a beautiful girl with an amazing heart and an adorable laugh.

My life is wonderful. It could not get better. I say that and the next day rolls around and it's better than the previous day. 

HIGH ON LIFE.

No Superman

Has anyone (if anyone is there) seen Scrubs, the television show?




I have to say that Scrubs is one of my favorite shows because it was introduced to me by my older sister, Marissa. In the theme song, the last line is "I'm no superman" and we always used to sing it while doing ridiculous dance motions.
I thought of this line tonight. As I was trying to recall my number one fear, I realized it was disappointing others. Most of my actions are pretty selfish in life, even though the intentions are selfless. But most of the time, I try to please others above myself. Even if this sometimes ends up hurting myself in the end.
The near end of high school is making me realize all that I have done while at Central. I have been involved in many programs, led quite a few, improved some, and enjoyed all of them. But this year, as my interests dwindled, I realized I couldn't and shouldn't do everything. I love to serve others, but what benefit is it to others if I am hurting myself in the process. I have had a very relaxing year due to my delegation of responsibilities, but I still have an underlying fear.



It's impossible to keep in contact with all of my friends. Occasionally, they will text, facebook, or call. I tend to push some aside if I am busy and never get back to them. I know I am at a busy time in my life, but if I can't keep in contact with my friends now, how will I ever when we all spread to a lot of different places?



I guess I need to come to an understanding that I, solely, cannot please everyone. And I, solely, cannot do everything. I'm NO super(wo)man.


But I want to.

Is it the thought that counts?

Maybe not...

IB

What if I told you that tonight I was in a room with the future? No, I was not watching "Back to the Future", I was at an International Baccalaureate program banquet. I think I have been taking advantage of all the wonderful people that are fellow classmates. Each individual that stood at the front had a different story, style, dream, past, and future. It's amazing to know that next year, 110 of us will be spread in a million different places going different directions with different goals and ambitions. But we all have one thing in common.

We went to Central High School. We are bulldogs forever.

ONE ONE. 
*let the emotional season of graduation time commence.*

Tomorrow: choir, senior picnic, PROM :)

I am not sure if my life could get much better.

Bulldog

It's true. I'm decided.

Truman State University, Class of 2015 :)
Bulldog for 4 more years!

This past weekend, my friend Molly and I went to Truman to visit some friends and revisit the campus. We had a wonderful experience touring the different buildings and dorms and revealing the little wonders of student life. While we were there, they were celebrating the end of the school year with a big activity on the Quad with food, snowcones, and rock climbing walls. It was fun to see college students interacting and know that I will be there next year.

Molly Mitchell and I at my birthday party.

 
Throughout all of the fun and discovery of a new campus, town, and life, we managed to experience small anxiety attacks anticipating this new life. In two short weeks, the world we have grown in and loved will be separated from us forever. We will not only be leaving our friends, but also our family, hometown, jobs, favorite restaurants and stores. As I begin to enter one of the most emotional times of my life, I am also fearful for my future. Before, I was only "fearful" in a shallow sense in the aspect that I had made no decisions on my future location. Although, I did know that I would be okay wherever I decided to attend. Now, my fear arises from reality. Who knew reality could be so scary?

I do know that all seniors are facing some degree of fear to leave and be on their own. For now, we focus on the present...which includes so many IB tests.

HELLO ALL-NIGHTER (<---one example that I'm ready for college)